Neal and Stopping

Here's to Neal. He's a guy I never met, but he's a guy who had an influence over some of my decision making in my younger days.

"I swore, for all those Saddiday nights I missed when I was in San Quentin I'd stay up every Saturday night for two full years to make up." -Neal Cassady

And boy, did he ever work his ass off to try to make up for all those lost Saturdays. Neal exemplified non-stop, and that reminds me of a stupid joke I like to tell over and over until most people walk away, disgusted at my lack of creativity: Remember folks, Drugs don't kill - it's the STOPPING part that kills! There are a lot of stories about how Neal died, but most of it is conjecture. The certificate from the authorities in Mexico says 'all systems congested'. That about sums it up: Neal just stopped. It makes little sense to paint a mythic picture of how Neal's body stopped- the damned thing just crapped out, and that's all that needs to be said. To further drive home the stopping thing, here's a quote from a guy who also stopped:

"I mean, whatever kills you kills you, and your death is authentic no matter how you die." - Jerry Garcia

Now, one might conclude from the above that I'm a morbid bastard. Quite the contrary - I'm inviting you to go out and live life in a robust and full manner, free from the worry of that inevitable day when things just stop. It's Go Time!

Mystery Toe Gap

Check out this amazing toe gap on my feet. I never paid attention to this until my girlfriend pointed it out to me a few years ago. Suddenly a mystery developed: why are my first two toes not into hanging out with my last three toes? I have several theories:

1. In a former life, I was a member of the Huaorani tribe in the Amazon river basin, and my toe gap helped me to climb trees and navigate the rigors of the rain forest with ease.

2. While sleepwalking, I love to smoke big cigars with my feet.

3. I had webbed toes as a newborn, and the doctor who sliced the webbed skin from between my toes took too much. The trauma was so great that my mother never told me what happened.

4. As a newborn, someone removed my sixth toe. See comment 3 above.

With a toe gap like this, one would think that I'm an agile motherfucker, sleek and surefooted as a gazelle. Unfortunately, this is not the case. In fact, as a child, when I played soccer, baseball or some other game with the neighborhood kids, I wasn't picked last - oftentimes I wasn't even picked - they would play a man short and I would watch from the sidelines or go home and eat Twinkies, read science fiction books, and grow boy boobies.